I Climbed the Wrong Mountain
People often have a vague sense of what they want, but struggle to define how to turn that into desire and action.
I call it being on the wrong mountain.
We all experience want. We have dreams as children, but we get brainwashed by society and cultural norms to be reasonable. We get limited by the box that we can only go as far as our talent and genetics take us.
We retreat and stay safe instead; we stuff the pain, disappointment and doubts we accumulate along the way deep down inside, when if we had the innocence of a child, we would go out risking failure, being creative, and having no expectations.
I stepped off the pro racing circuit in 2018, mentally fried from struggling with how to get what I wanted.
I fumbled for months, reassessed why I ride my bike, and got back to it again with an understanding that all along, I was climbing the wrong mountain. That vision looks like this…
I was climbing a mountain — at the time I even thought it was big. It took talent and some hard work to get there. I thought it would bring me happiness to win a race, to prove I could do it as a mother of twins — I thought the end results would fill a void. But I crested that mountain only to see there was another mountain in the distance calling my name; it was much higher and more difficult than the one I’d just topped.
That mountain in the distance was the one I needed to be on!! I’d climbed only to see…
I WAS CLEARLY ON THE WRONG MOUNTAIN.
To get to MY mountain, I’d have to descend into a valley full of failures and doubts, unwind my thoughts, and start again at the base of a much more difficult climb.
And talent won’t suffice for this climb. I need courage, facing fears, peeling off layers of myself to understand my mind. It takes self-discipline and the willingness to ask for help. It takes a leap of faith.
What are your goals and dreams worth to you?
How much are you willing to push, ask for help, start again, be uncomfortable, ride the edge, do what scares you, sacrifice comfort, and pursue the rugged path it takes to get those goals? If you’re on the wrong mountain…are you up for the challenge of climbing again?
I speak this with all the love in my heart:
WAKE UP TO YOUR DREAMS and CLIMB YOUR MOUNTAIN.
Life doesn’t come around twice, guys. We ask children all the time, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” So why do we stop asking that question as adults, as though we are fixed in our ways by the time we are 22 years old?
What are your adult goals and dreams? What are they worth to you?! Do you believe you can make changes to get them? And are you willing to undergo some pain now to not live with the regret later of having not tried your best?
I came back to racing in 2019 with a renewed vision to climb the right mountain. It is defined by the journey…the process, and how I share it.
Ernie and I are both aiming to push our limits to the highest extreme in an effort to understand ourselves, regroup, then share everything we’ve learned to help athletes and individuals of all abilities learn to do the same with their own goals.
I promise you: the tallest, hardest mountain is the one worth climbing. When you choose that mountain, you will view yourself and others through liberated eyes. You won’t be defined by whether or not you were “successful”. You’ll be defined by your beautiful journey and how you shared it. But it’s fucking hard, guys. “The struggle is guaranteed. Success is not.” - Tom Bilyeu
The Silk Road Mountain Race is our biggest push yet to equip ourselves with the mentality it takes to raise those limits.
Mountains have been on my heart and in my visual imagery bank for a long time now. Our Leborne Coaching logo…our t-shirts…they mean something deep to me. I’ve always loved to climb on my bike, but my love was blinded by fear after I felt self-defeated on climbs in several key races. As seen in my opening picture — I even had the yellow jersey in one of them — and for a long time I became scared of climbing.
I’ve realized this past year mountains are a spiritual symbol for me…not because of the opportunity to win anything. Because I love what they teach me about the journey, how they’ve broken me then inspired me with their monumental size. The bigger the boulder, the larger the obstacle, the more I come to understand who I am and what I’m about — and what it means to keep my eyes set upward.
We’d love your help as we climb.
The Silk Road will be our biggest mountain yet. We will literally be climbing huge mountain passes, but will also be figuratively pushing ourselves to climb like never before.
When Ernie and I got accepted in January of this year, we knew it would be an expensive trip — one that, without a doubt we’d incur debt for if necessary. We know it’s the right mountain for where we are in life right now. We are therefore committed to making it happen, and we’re willing to work hard to pay it off. But we’d love some partners to support the way and share the journey.
As we train, invest in the correct equipment, and travel to Kyrgyzstan in August, we’re taking donations from anyone willing to give. Not asking for help doesn’t inspire anyone, anyway. Keeping to ourselves and not sharing the honest process doesn’t feel right, either.
There’s a button below you can click to make a contribution of any amount.
And we’d love to help you climb your mountain.
I would love the opportunity to continue sharing our journey with you and hear about yours, as well. Can I be a part of helping you get your goals and dreams as I strive to reach my own? Can we build a community that supports each other on the highest level when it comes to reaching for new limits? Let’s grow with each other’s adventures.
Be clear on what mountain you’re on…and